Part-time Comedian. Full-Time American Indian.
Hedwig and the Angry Inch nosebleed seats for @tgoldsby Ides of March birthday!
Yeah the Loch Ness Monster was at Chicago's river dying. #Chicago
This remains the most lady-like Scout has held herself.
Scout likes yoga naps.
I have kept the @barackobama Farewell on my TiVo to watch a President speak cogent, grammatically sound sentences devoid of extraneous adjectives, adverbs and tweet exclamations of "bad!".
When the 1950's mom and pop hardware store closed, Home Depot bought the rest of their popcorn bags.
Here is Steve Bannon (@the_real_costacoast ) doing "Steve's Peeves" regarding transgender bathrooms @gallerycabaret last night at #cupcakecomedycabaret
I have this sneaking suspicion my thermostat isn't working. #Chicago #LoganSquare
I bought a ring on Valentine's Day for my favorite person! It's so him because it's not too flashy, was pricey but I used a coupon to pay for it!
My fiancée @tgoldsby was so jealous of my Valentine. @c.d.peacock
I hear you can sell dogs for meat. Do you have pricing per pound?