Insert something pompous and self congratulatory here.
It's Sunday, the Heels are playing, I'm 40. Fuck it, it's daiquiri time.
Possibly the most perfect #cheesecake I've ever made. #NoCracks
That's not happiness. That's deleriousness.
Gettin' down in Germany.
Sparklers with the kiddos at the @sarahjanegreen house.
Sneaking a shot of the little man.
Trying to sell a car seat in Craigslist. So far, it isn't going well.
Keep your message simple. #adlife
I've had 8 cars in my lifetime. But on Monday, I'll be getting my 13th windshield.
Just doing what it takes to get by. #inauguration #wtf #itscometothis